Pond Skimming 101
Column by Heather Burke March 30, 2008

As this winter’s deep snow layers slowly melt away on the ski slopes, so does the brain activity among certain skiers. Spring skiing brings out the zaniest outfits, and the most bizarre behavior of the entire season. Suddenly people are skiing in shorts - which seems like such fun until you fall on the loose frozen granular (ouch!). Kids create cardboard box sleds and downhill dummies only to send them down the slopes and watch them self-destruct, even decapitate.

Maybe spring skiing silliness comes from too many days on snow – a season’s worth of the cold sport may cause brain freeze among its most frequent flyers. Perhaps too many après ski beverages have been consumed by the fourth winter month. How else can you explain attempting to ski across a pond of chilly water at the base of the ski mountain, in front of a crowd cheering for you to splash and crash? Pond skimmers should have their heads examined - or at least buy a really good boot dryer – since it’s inevitable that your ski equipment will get drenched.

Despite the dubious physics of a glide across a pond on skis, this silly spring ski event returns every season in late March and early April at ski resorts across the country. Pond skimmers line up at the top of man-made 50-foot long puddles of icy water, waiting for their chance to skim, or more likely – swim, wearing heavy ski gear (that becomes heavier once water logged).

There must be a technique amongst seasoned successful skimmers. I asked a few freaks who have done this downhill daredevil deed. Here are some tips on how to skim, or at least not get super soaked:

The wider your boards (skis or snowboard) - the better your float ratio. While snowboards are better designed to plane across water than skinnier skis, keeping a flat board proves challenging (tip your board either way and you’re toast – soggy wet toast).

You need to approach the pond with considerable speed and balance. The precise moment when you transition from snow to pond, you need to get your weight back (like waterskiing) as you will rapidly decelerate. If you are too far forward - you will go head first into the frigid water – to the ovation of onlookers. If you are too far back, your butt and back will make quick contact with a big wet chill.

Make it across the 50-foot pond, and you still have one more hurdle – launching up and over the lip at the end. Depending on the construction of the pond and your place in line (water drains out as each skimmer splashes in), you need some last minute momentum and oomph to clear the embankment at the end.

The costume probably doesn’t improve your chances of making it across the expanse of effluent (okay - melted snow). In fact, a cumbersome costume may hinder your hang time. But it sure gets the crowds in your camp cheering for you when your ensemble is particularly clever, funny or festive. Past pond attempters have included clowns, nuns, Superman and brave bikini-wearers.

Shawnee Peak held its 23rd annual Spring Fling last weekend with a pond skim they call the Slush Cup. For those preferring to stay dry and comfortable in their bed, Shawnee Peak rolled out their 1st annual American Mattress Race yesterday, contestants dragged their old mattresses up the hill and competed for best decoration title and for the winning “fastest mattress” title.

Saddleback’s pond skimming event is next Saturday, April 5. They call it the Smelt Run to honor the Rangeley Lakes region’s fishing heritage – or maybe it’s to describe the odor from your ski boots after getting a good soaking in the pond.

Sunday River’s pond skim is Sunday, April 6 at 11am. This annual show down coincides with Parrot Head weekend, now in year 21. A big beach–attired crowd shows up at the White Cap base area for island music, margarita tasting, and pond watching. I know last year, even the scantily clad Bud Light girls on the sidelines got soaked at Sunday River’s event.

If you float effortlessly (or at least stay dry) across Shawnee Peak, Saddleback and Sunday River’s ponds, you are without a doubt – a big Maine fish among little ponds. You should continue your quest and attempt the world title. The World Pond Skimming Championships are held at Vail annually, this year April 12 is your chance to be the superior skimmer on the planet. Two years ago, I witnessed this saturated spring party, and watched a Jon Bon Jovi look alike excel at this enormously popular event. The crowds of over 1,000 spectators watched in amazement as his perfectly coiffed blonde hairdo stayed high and dry for several elimination round skims.

What runs a chill up your spine quicker than landing in that cold pond of melted snowmaking water? Hearing your daughter say the words, “I am going to do pond skimming this year.” So I’ll be there on the sidelines trying to stay dry, and wishing the same for my crazy teenager attempting this rite of spring skiing.
 

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